jumping the gun with a Christmas post today? i don't know, but my brain has already been there, doing that. for some reason october is the catalyst... my heart is totally into fall; the spicyness, the chill, the football, the orangey mums... and then suddenly, a dash of Christmas. nowadays, any time i think of something i want to pick up at the store or buy on amazon, it automatically goes on my mental Christmas list. too early? maybe. but it's keeping me from spending money today. :)

if i were making my list today, here's what i'd say.

a. a cozy pair of flats. happy with your flats? fill me in. maybe i need those ones that look bendy?
b. almond butter. mmm. yes. i love asking for food for Christmas. almond butter is expensive!
c. food processor/blender. my kitchen needs some help. (fingers crossed for a 12-cup processor!)
d. new robe. nothing expensive, because it will be getting spit upon. but white is nice for bleaching.
e.  the music man. i want to put this movie on our iPad and take it wherever i go in life.
f. weck canning jars. pretty. glass. storage. end of story.
g. herbal tea. grocery store gifts are my fave, remember? i'd like rooibos and chamomile, please.
h. non-maternity yoga pants. i thought my maternity ones would still work… uhhh. no.

and today She & Him released a Christmas album! how fun is that. go take a listen! the previews of the Christmas waltz and sleigh ride sound super sweet. like an updated Carpenters Christmas vibe. definitely going to Spottify this one come december.

The Christmas Waltz
Sleigh Ride

sound: the heat kicking on.
sight: hadley's new closed mouth smile. or her rolling over all by herself.
smell: woodsmoke. i don't love our neighbor's junky backyard, but i will take the smoke smell gladly.
taste: raw apple cider vinegar. proof that grant has taught me something.
feeling: clean sheets and a heavy bedspread in a cold bedroom.*
*disclaimer. must be accompanied by a tall, handsome, warm husband.
blog: family dressed in tweed. monster cookies. 

ps. this post was created entirely by my left hand! while nursing!

Not chilly where you live yet? I understand. I live in Minnesota and this week I've been okay with no socks! Crazy, crazy. And those of you who know me know that is big; my feet are wimps when it comes to cold. But hey. Everyone, the cold is coming. Soon we'll be all wrapped up in our scarves, feet shoved into boots, and pleased as punch about it. or at least I will.


I made this a couple weeks back when it actually was cool outside. A fluke fall day. I was even wearing slippers. Think late afternoon, gray skies, thunderstormy, pumpkins on doorsteps, leaves descending from the walnut tree in your backyard… this bowl goes perfectly with all that. I ate it up and felt all steamy inside. It was an amazing snack, and so easy, but has also been substantial enough for dinner. Several times. It's a new favorite.


Quinoa and Caramelized Onion Veggie Bowl

Adjust all measurements to your taste!

½ red onion, sliced
3 T. olive oil
1 small zucchini, or whatever veggie you have
1 cup soaked, cooked quinoa
2 cloves garlic, minced
salt, to taste

Heat olive oil on medium until hot but not smoking. Add sliced onion and a sprinkle of salt. Cook, stirring occasionally, until soft. Add zucchini (or another veggie) and sauté until desired softness. Mix in the quinoa and garlic, stirring for a minute or two more- until everything is well combined and steamy. On a sidenote: I am very, very sad that the zucchini is going to disappear soon. I am eating my fill of it this week. zucchini chips everyday! Everybody talks about it like "Oh, I just have to find a way to use up all this zucchini..." I have the answer: send it to ME.

in the fall, i tend to gravitate toward mellow music and jazzy stuff. i'll be honest: i love enya. she fits fall like a glove. also, harry connick jr. is a regular while i'm making dinner. and norah jones while we're changing the diaper. and you know nat king cole is my guy. but today Hadley and i are listening to these two lovelies.

the bottom window is the 2011 music video from our camp maintenance men- grant included, of course. hadley loves watching these guys! (if you like grease, you might enjoy this.)

can you talk more about Hadley? you are so sweet. thanks for caring. i feel like there are so many people that already love my little girl. she is shooting me a smile as i type this, just so you know. we'll say it's for all of you :) so, honestly, i could talk non-stop about miss Hadley. but i have been keeping the spotlight soft as Grant and i decide how much exposure we want her to have. it's just a personal thing. i will be sharing bits and pieces about her i'm sure, but we are still figuring out what feels like it belongs on the blog, and what belongs with us. i know you guys understand, because you are great like that.

Hadley actually has her own blog now! it's a private one, just a little spot for us to stash photos, videos, and leave her notes and document little things like today we read goodnight moon for the first time. it's so nice that we live in a time where there are such things as blogs. i would never get anywhere with a baby book. i don't even get photos developed anymore.

are you going to post your birth story? the answer is yes! i know, i love hearing how other girls experience the biggest event ever. and i am excited to tell you what it was like for me! the reason you've been waiting so long is two-fold: 1. i've been afraid to tackle it! birth is huge. and personal. knowing what to say and how to mold it into a post is tricky! 2. a story takes time. something i am not rich in right now. it also takes concentration.. a little hard to come by also :) but don't worry, i'm working on it! i've already got the timeline all written up.

any more questions for me? ask away! leave them in my comment box or send me a formspring :)

the minute Hadley is happy in her swing or settled down for a nap my mind is absolutely reeling with thoughts of all the things i am going to get done. that is how i tick. i am a hopeless perfectionist who thrives on being producive and is easily stressed when things pile up. but, i can't let myself get carried away with the to-do list because the job will no doubt be interrupted before i finish. i will hear her almost 4-month-old voice carry through the house, and my progress will stop. time's up! and then i have a choice. let my heart sink at the thought of everything that didn't get done, or be grateful for a tiny baby that needs me and will surely be smiling when i pick her up and say, "hi, babycakes!".

priorities. they get absolutely skewered when your first baby hits the scene. sleeping and eating and surviving are your assignments. but now that sleep has become a regular part of life again, other jobs are back in the front of my mind. and i am constantly asking myself "should i be doing this right now?" -constantly trying to pinpoint what is the most pressing. my to-do tasks feel like so many shuffled cards rather than an ordered list. any one of them could be the most important thing at the moment. gradually i am stacking them up though, realizing the things that can wait, and remembering that real life comes with interruptions. and i pray that when they show up uninvited to my being-productive party, i will respond in a joyful way. maybe i can even learn to expect them, realizing the oppprtunity to see God design my day. (did i think I was in control?)

so for the time being, the bits of my day where i can accomplish things are random, and i am still figuring out how to best manage it. i do struggle with feeling behind, feeling like i am letting people down. some nights i go up to our room and lament the fact that our sheets aren't freshly washed and the stuff that was sitting on the floor yesterday is still there today. but (note to self:) this is the season i am in, it won't always be like this, and i can't handle it on my own. this is what the Lord has given me today! and i say welcome to it. His grace is sufficient for today. by His grace, Hadley will be mothered, the scrambled egg pan will get scrubbed, and the toilet paper will be replenished. and miracle of miracles, maybe an email will even be responded to! but only by His grace.

ps. there were innumerable interruptions in the writing of this post. it takes an average of 3 days now to complete and hit publish on my thoughts :)

in our family, october 5th carries the title of "most beautiful day of the year," as it typically shows up with lovely weather and hits right when our autumn color breaks. it's true! today it is sunny and 85 degrees (way warmer than i could've hoped for. lucky me!) and the tree outside my front window all of a sudden has the prettiest mustard yellow leaves. and all the maples on maple street (right behind our house) are just reaching their prime. yep. october 5th is practically perfect.

it also happens to be the day grant proposed to me. four years ago! that was the perfect date.

isn't it fun to have another holiday in october?

you know what else is fun about october. the food. let's talk about it while i dig through my archives.


mmmmmmm. let's enjoy all this octoberness.

and we are loving wearing cardigans and plaid!

although we will be changing into a tshirt and flip flops later, because it's going to get to 80 degrees today. :) hey, the mornings are still chilly. that's my kind of fall. i will be giddy whenever the first snow flies.. which, historically, could be any day now, but for now i will take the hot sun! and of course, my bare feet. the day i have to give up my flip flops is a sad day indeed. have you gotten any cider-smelling candles out yet? you know that i have.

isn't our little pumpkin looking so grown up? she will be 4 months in a couple weeks!

we're headed out for a walk, where i will be going out of my way to step on crunchy leaves.
happy tues!

let's catch up, shall we?
how will you remember september 2011? i will remember it as the time when i was hitting my stride.

a few weeks ago i sat indian style in our bedroom, at 10 o'clock at night, tweezing my brows. that's when i knew. if you are choosing brows over sleep, you have definitely hit some kind of post-baby stride. the sleep deficit has officially faded away. yaaaay! my first thought when i wake up is no longer "i need a nap today." i never understood the power, the privilege, of sleeping at night until now. now, i know. that rhythm is essential. getting back to it is like being able to take deep breaths.

and let me tell you about this magic 3 month mark. the weeks sandwiching this phase are full of prizes! sleep, smiles, and naps, squeaks and gurgles too! september was a huge growing month for miss Hadley. for all of us. i think she slept through the night every night! thank you, Lord! she even has a bedtime and sleeps in her own room. wow. we are so spoiled, i know. i love that she is getting so strong and stable- carrying her on my hip is a feeling i've been waiting for my whole life.

so blogging was pretty scaled back during september. life was full, and so were my hands, most of the time. before i had a baby, i didn't understand "two-handed time." now i understand very well! two hands all to myself is an uncommon occurrence; these minutes must be spent very thoughtfully. i am learning so much about being unselfish with my time! speaking of which, has anyone caught any episodes of that new show Up All Night? the one about having a new baby? i'm just wondering, in those scenes where the husband and wife are standing at the kitchen sink chatting, or one is doing laundry and the other is making a meal, or they are staring out the window spying on their new neighbors… so.. where is the baby? always sleeping? :)

one more thing before i hit the sack: you should read this. she's got it. it's exactly what i wanted to write mid-july, if i had only had some time with two hands. i love it!